“You’re a Robot” – Most Ex-Boyfriends (2003- until I die)
“You’re Emotionally Gender-Queer.” – Anonymous Good Friend with a Mental Health Background (2013)
I haven’t posted in over six months. I’m disgusting, I know. I’ve even taken ANOTHER San Francisco trip in between this time. My life has been like a snow globe that has been cracked open with shards of glass everywhere. I’ve steadily put the pieces together, and I haven’t felt like blogging this year. This is some real talk. God/The Universe/Oprah decided to throw me in to the ocean of uncertainty, and punctured all of my floatation devices. I survived, and in the process, I learned a lot about myself.
For instance, there has been some crying. The fact that I am admitting this is a big deal because I hate crying almost as much as vomiting. Both happen sometimes after drinking, and on a few occasions, both have happened in one night. Seeing me in tears is rare. If you order your meat rare and it’s still breathing, that’s how rare it is. After dipping my toe into my emotions and pool of tears, I realized that it’s not so bad. It’s like you’re a microwavable dinner, and you have to cut a slit into the plastic to let all the steam flow in and out once in a while.
During these past six months, I have been open to a lot of self-work and figuring myself out. I took several online Myers Briggs Personality tests, and found out I am an ENTP. What this translates to is: I’m Extroverted, I am iNtuitive (abstract-thinker when processing info), I use my Thinking (decision-making process), and I Perceive (adaptable and keep my options open). Of course, I’m not a 100% of either of those items, but I am more inclined to be these things. Put together, I have the personality of an ENTP. Through this, I found my strengths and my weakness:
- Very creative; full of ideas
- Excellent conversationalist
- Enjoys debating topics with other people
- Places a great deal of emphasis on knowledge
- Dislike schedules and routines
- Good at leading others
- Does not like to be controlled
- Very logical
I also found out several fictional characters have my personality type. Below, you can see that I don’t have the personality type of any of the beautiful and dainty Disney Princesses, but I have the personality type of Ursula, the sea witch, and Jack Sparrow from Pirates of the Caribbean. Willy Wonka and Urkel are in there too. I found this on Tumblr, so these are scientific facts.
I’d also like to add, that after extensive research, I found out that Chandler Bing from Friends is also an ENTP. I admit, this makes sense because I make jokes when I’m nervous. I can also talk to a wall if I have no one else to talk to. Could I be anymore amazing?
The last time I took the test, it revealed something very interesting: I am on the fence of Feeling vs. Thinking. It means that I now consider my feelings when making decisions. Me. Feelings. Can you believe that? I certainly can’t. I used to get confused between my gut-feelings and nausea, now I get it. My goal is to access and assess my feelings. To “go with it” – even if that means I jump into things with my eyes closed and use any ounce of trust to believe I won’t die. I’m tired of being logical and using my brain. My heart is thawing out, and the icy exterior is melting rapidly. Blame it on global warming because this is an inconvenient truth. Damn you, Al Gore.
Even when I’m trying to be serious, I end with a joke…oh well.